Knock! Knock & Hello!

pexels-photo-186077.jpegThe lights are on but no one is home.   Is that familiar to you?  Are you tuned in or zoned out again. Are you going all around the place and wondering why you are there? Asking yourself what did you come for? Are you forgetting things so much and questioning yourself if it is the beginning of Alzheimer?

Sometimes, age makes silly things happen to the mind and you start to wonder if all is well upstairs.  Like regularly losing your keys or have to retrace your step in a bid to remember what you came for.  Other times the clutter of life all around us turns our mental state into disarray.  It is important to learn to bring ourselves back to planet earth before the bulb shatters upstairs.

I came across 5 grounding techniques as shared below:

How to Ground Yourself: 5 Grounding Techniques

Try one of the following grounding techniques right now to observe the effects.

Cover Your Crown

I don’t fully understand why this grounding exercise is so effective, but it almost always works. When you are ungrounded, place one hand over the crown your head. That’s it. If it helps, close your eyes to avoid distractions.

Time: 30 seconds to 1 minute.

Feel Your Feet

I often use this technique with my clients because it’s so fast and effective. Sitting or standing, place all of your awareness on the bottom of your feet. Pay attention to any sensations.

Time: 30 seconds to 1 minute.

Follow Your Breath

Close your eyes and as you inhale, trace the air as it enters your nose and goes into your lungs. On the exhale, follow the air leaving your lungs and exiting your nose or mouth.

This grounding technique gets more effective with practice. The key is to observe the breath instead of forcing it with your mind. Let your body lead and your mind will follow.

Time: 1 minute to 10 minutes.

Stand Like a Tree

We discussed this powerful grounding technique in a previous guide to anancient standing meditation.

Stand with your feet parallel and at least shoulder’s width apart. Keep your head floating above your body, chin tucked, and spine straight. Rest your hands at your side or place them over your navel.

Sink all of your body’s weight and tension into your feet (without collapsing your posture), allowing it to be absorbed into the ground. To support this grounding process, imagine roots growing out the bottom of your feet, extending deep into the ground beneath you.

Time: 1 minute to 10 minutes.

For a complete guide on how to correct your posture and build energy standing still, click here.

Take a Cold Shower

This grounding technique has many health benefits. Cold exposure has shown to increase immunityreduce fat, and elevate mood (by triggering dopamine). If you’re not accustomed to cold showers, at the end of your hot shower, make the water warm/cool for 30 seconds.

Over the course of the next three weeks, make the water slightly cooler and stay under it for longer. By the end of the three weeks, your body will get used to the cold temperature. It’s an invigorating and grounding experience. I recommend it unless you have high blood pressure.

Time: 30 seconds to 5 minutes.

Source: https://scottjeffrey.com/grounding-techniques/

Just Do You

Have you been in a situation when you feel someone is not happy because of something that you have done.  You have treated them with respect as much as you can, tried to please them and yet you find them still always wearing a sour face around you and sulking.  pexels-photo-944762.jpeg

I, probably stand alone in my world of not being able to handle tantrums in adults. Children, I can understand sometimes need to vent to express themselves.  My children while growing up used take 3 minutes to go to the back garden and shout while beating their chest like king kong, and then come in smiling as a way of venting.  We all used to find it funny but it was their fun way of letting out.

I have learnt in life that happiness is a choice thing.  If I focus my entire life in developing strategies to make you happy and You, on the other hand, have purposed in your heart to be miserable.  Clearly, all my effort is wasted.  The best choice then is to be happy in yourself, knowing that you have and are treating everyone with respect, show that you care but never put your life on hold trying to make anyone happy.

Just Do You.  Happiness is a choice thing and cannot be forced on others.  You do not owe anyone the responsibility to make them happy neither does anyone have the obligation to make you happy.

Points You must Consider before lending money to friends or relatives

  1. Legal Document

Don’t lend money without a legal document. Legal document for this type of loans would be loan agreement or promissory note. It should be made legal document and stamped by legal personnel.

  1. Personal Information

The document should clearly capture identity proof such as ID card number of both lender and borrower.

  1. Repayment Schedule & Interest rates

Your document should clearly mention about repayment schedule monthly, yearly or lump sum. Along with periodicity or repayment, It should also mention interest rates applicable on loan amount.

  1. Dispute and Exclusion conditions

The legal document may or may not include a condition in case of dispute or default. One should also mention exclusion condition if any.

  1. Amendment

A loan agreement or promissory note can be modified/amended by mutual agreements between lender and borrower. You can make provision of amendment clause in the agreement.

  1. Witness

There is no legal requirement of a witness in the loan agreement or promissory note. However, as an additional safety get the document signed by a witness. The witness should not be related to any party.

  1. Payment via bank transfer

Make sure to pay money via bank transfer for transparency and reference the amount in the legal document.

  1. Interest on Tax Component

Interest-free loans are non-taxable for both lenders and borrowers. However, if a provision of interest is kept lender have to pay tax on interest earned.

  1. Loan without Interest

Loans without interest from friends and relative are considered as Gift. Gifts from family members are not taxable.

Additional Food for thought before lending money to friends and relatives

  • You should assess the capacity of the borrower to pay loans in the future.
  • You should remember that there are chances that you can lose relationship because of these types of loans.
  • If a relationship is important consider loan as a gift. Assess your capacity and lend the amount which you are capable to write off.
  • You can earn more money if you invest this money in other instruments as mutual funds/equity.
  • Over to You

 

Source: https://moneyexcel.com/18894/lending-money-friends-relative-points-must-consider. (The information in the original article has been updated in line with modern methods of banking)

Safe, Too safe or Risky

On my way to the training room yesterday. I couldn’t help but notice how some people held the handrails on the stairs as they climbed up and others didn’t.  Immediately, I recalled one of the safety procedures in a previous place of work. Everyone had to hold the rails while climbing the stairs and you had the right to challenge anyone that did not, irrespective of who they are in the organisation.  (Being your brother’s keeper)pexels-photo-371243.jpeg

I also recalled years ago, as I held the rails in a public place and a friend advised me not to. Her take on the issue being, every Tom, Dick and Harry would have held the same rail and you have no clue what the hands were doing prior to touching the rails.

So, who is right and who is wrong?

Sometimes in a bid to stay safe, we go overboard and avoid every kind of risk. Meanwhile some level of risk taken is necessary if we are to make any difference in life. We can be safe to our own good and also to our own detriment.  Let’s learn to strike a balance between safety and risky so we can live a more fulfilling life.

Would love to know your views on the above dilemma. In your opinion,  who is right and why?

It’s Not Over Until You Win

One of the greatest speakers of our time confirms that truly out of the mouths of babies and sucklings, wisdom does come.

Les Brown was born with his twin brother Wesley on February 17, 1945 in a low-income section of Miami, Florida in an abandoned building. He was subsequently given up for adoption and adopted by Mamie Brown, a then 38-year-old single woman who worked as a cafeteria attendant and domestic assistant. He was declared “educably mentally retarded” while in grade school. Despite the obvious self-esteem issues this created, with the encouragement of his mother and assistance by a helpful teacher in high school, he learned how to reach his full potential, a key point in many motivational speeches he gives now.

Brown speeches focus on the importance of having a strong belief in yourself. And he teaches that you need to be bold and have supreme self-confidence. Brown also believes many people that set goals are setting their bar too low. ” Most people fail in life not because they aim to high and miss. But, because they aim to low and hit,” said Brown.  –

Source: https://motivationgrid.com/top-motivational-speakers/

Show Up and Serve

Sometimes, you just want to stay home especially after having a long week at work. Your time by yourself becomes so precious. Yet, the invitation to attend an event at a friend’s place is staring you in the face from the dinning table.  The easiest thing to do is to ignore and chill with you, yourself and your me time.  The hardest is to get yourself in that party mood and go hang out.pexels-photo-545058.jpeg

However, if you take the few seconds to think of your friend, think of the relationship, think of being there for someone who cares, think of meeting new people, or old acquaintances, think of the cost of getting there, think of the conversation that may be productive or draining.  The wisest choice to make is to show up and serve.

Why do I say this, no  matter how difficult the cost of getting you there physically and emotionally is, you are the winner in the long run.  Every new relationship you make adds to your network and every old relationship rekindled lifts up your networth

So, pull up your pants, tighten your belt and show up and serve.

My Mistake

Every day I make mistakes. Sometimes in my thoughts, sometimes in my words and speeches and often times in my deeds.

I gave it a long thought and I concluded that as long as I am human, I will make mistake because I am not perfect.

Do I learn from my mistakes? Do I take ownership for my errors? Do I try and improve on my faults?  All these are the more important questions for my self development instead of the finger pointing and judgments with evil eyes that follow people when they fault.  Guess how many mistakes Thomas A Edison made before He succeeded.  In his words “I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work.” “Many of life’s failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up.”

Now that is from Thomas Edison an incredibly successful inventor, scientist, and businessman, who accumulated 1,093 patents in his lifetime. I don’t know about you but I am going about my life doing things as best as I can, loving my mistakes and improving on me.

You are what you believe

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