When the Robber…….

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How ready are you?

The first time I heard the saying; When the robber hits the road, I automatically pictured a thief being chased from his hiding in a rough uneven road and when he got onto the motorway and was able to run faster. My imagination being active painted a picture for me that explained what I thought I heard. Later I discovered it was not what I thought but the interpretation was close enough.

When the rubber meets the road is purely a case of opportunity meeting preparation. The right environment for the creation of success. We all have goals, dreams, desires, aspirations and wishes. These desires and good things we want for ourselves will forever stay the same, if we do not actively create the environment for them to take off and to survive.

Opportunity is exactly what it is. According to Merriam-Webster dictionary,  Opportunity is a favorable juncture of circumstances. It is always desired and though sometimes expected, it\’s time frame is usually unpredictable. As much as opportunity is the trigger that creates that success environment, it can be a total waste if there is no preparedness.

How prepared are you for your next opportunity. How ready are you to take off, Are you still unclear of the path to take or even why you are here. For some people, it is an issue of identity while it is purpose or the plan for others. It could be business or personal. The bottom line is the fact that you need to understand the why and the process.

Since getting clarity on the saying; when the rubber meets the road, my imagination is better fed to deliver a brand new set of wheels on a sound engine, about to take off on a long journey to a dream destination. The engine is revved up, the weather is good, the road is clear. The booth has spares and supplies for the trip. It is definitely not going to be a crawl. It is a well earned trip of, Legacy, Impact, Freedom and Empowerment. It is a LIFE sentence.

Above all, it is not the robber; it is the RUBBER.

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We are the product of our daily choices

Busola Shogbamimu is an independent life coach with The John Maxwell Team. She is passionate about self identity leading to self-actualization. She helps individuals and organisations develop their personnel towards unifying their corporate goals. Her empowerment slogan is #yhtk (You hold the key).

Who\’s coming along?

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It has indeed been a while since I did a blog post and I sure did miss sharing my thoughts here. Time spent doing other things was worthwhile and valued, but I am glad to be back.

Over the weekend, I was privileged to attend a follow up support call on a training program that I took. The host took his time to explain and gave so much value on the call. Then came the questions and answer session, and another phase of learning from other people\’s perspectives emerged. What blew me away was the patience, time and thought that went into answering everyone\’s questions. Even though we went over time, the motive of the host was without doubt; no-one must be left behind.

That definitely got me thinking. In our journey of life, who are we carrying along when we are going places? When the prospect is promising, who are we calling to view the other side? What kind of a traveller are we? Are you a solo- artist or you understand the power of two or more?

As the world gets smaller, systems are taking over in automation and fast tracking success. The importance of collaboration, team work, partnership, scaling and compounding is showing up more evidently in business and networking systems. Who are you carrying along? As that may be a wrong question for some people, I will ask then again; who are you going with?

I will leave the thoughts with you to process as I go pull my boat out for my own journey. You are more than welcome to come along my journey.

Contentment Vs Self-Actualization

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Happiness is being conscious that #YHTK

One of the most inspiring videos I have had the opportunity to come across tells the story of a contented woman. I watched this video at a time when the world was in chaos and world leaders could barely sleep. Families were dying all over the globe and death toll on a daily basis was the highlight of media channels.

The same time was described as unprecedented and even as I write today, countries are still trying to contain the virus activated life style that we all currently live. Yet, for the few people who could see beyond the chaos, they celebrated that they were part of history. It was famine and rationing in most places and most homes. However, this video caused me to cry tears of joy. The woman\’s joy was authentic. What she had and celebrated, most rich and famous people could never get, even if they exchanged all their wealth for it.

This brought me to the question of fulfillment, contentment and self-actualization. She was without any shadow of doubt, contented and most definitely on the path to self actualization. She was realistic, optimistic and open handed to welcome people to her home .If fulfillment is the definition of achievement of something desired, then I cannot honestly answer for her if she is fulfilled or not. She alone will be able to say what her aspirations are and if they are met or not. I leave you to decide after watching the video to share your thoughts below.

Proof that you may have nothing, yet be contented and happy

No matter what the day presents, my message for you today is simple. Enjoy the journey and smell the roses as you go. If you can\’t see the roses, take in the fresh air and be grateful that you can inhale and exhale. People on ventilators are struggling to do just that. Laugh daily, find your purpose and live without apology for who you are. Be true to yourself – that is one thing you should not compromise. Be your authentic self, it is too hard being a clone of someone else or a copy. It is better to be a bad original than a good copy.

Be intentional about your happiness and about being the difference you want to see in society. Embrace change, be open to ideas. Keep a gratitude journal as you consciously count your blessings. Accept what you cannot change and change what you can. Be deliberate about redesigning a better version of yourself on a daily basis. Live life as best as you can today, tomorrow is promised to no-one.

Your reason being #YHTK (You hold the key). The difference lies in purpose and living it through.

Scars and Medals

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Scars and Medals Photo by Andrea Piacquadio on Pexels.com

One of the quotes I am crazy about in recent times is attributed to Winston Churchill and it says \”if you are going through hell, keep going.\” Every leader knows that there are times when quitting seems to be very attractive, yet it is not an option. Always stop to consider all the shift that has gone before and the medal awaiting you at the goal post.

Life was never a promise of hunky dory and smooth sailing. The times when we acquire the burns, scratches and scars are truly our defining moments. The medal at the end of the race is desirable and it fuels the drive to keep going. No matter what we are faced with on a daily basis, let\’s keep going as It never truly ends until the last breath.

Do you have scars from yesteryears to look back on, reminding you that the struggle was real? If you are here today, then you walked through your previous hell and you will do it again and again. Winners don\’t quit and quitters don\’t win they say. If you did it before, sure you can do it again.

All you need to carry on is tackle one day at a time and an attitude of gratitude. It does not matter how big the mess is, start by handling what you can and this too shall pass! #YHTK (You hold the key).

How to live a worry free life

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Worry, just like stress does not produce any positive result for your well being.

Looking around you currently with the state of the global economy, the demands on the global health system, the unpredictable nature of the future; Are you thinking of the thin line between managing existing limited resources and poverty threshold? or unsure of where the next income stream is going to come from. Are you stressing about the many bills and people you still need to support? If so, you sure do have enough reasons to worry today.

Some people do not need all or some of the above before they worry. They are born worriers. They worry about the shape of the teabag, the colour of the soup, the middle name of their son\’s class teacher, why there are only six waffles in a pack, the look on the post man\’s face, people that greet or acknowledge them and the ones that ignore them. Simply put, they always have a reason to worry about something or the other.

On the other hand, some people float through life effortlessly like the world was made for them to skip through every hurdle. Do they have any problem? Sure they do! The difference being that they have taken a decision about the role of worry in their lives.

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Livng my worry free life

Who has worry helped?

Worrying has never been known to help anyone or solve a problem. Not one! What worry does is magnify the problem for you, create anxiety and fear. Fear paralyses you. Fear blocks you from seeing any possible solution. Fear eats you up and releases negative toxins in your body, thereby causing further ailments and diseases in the body.

How then do you handle worry?

I have always been accused of sauntering through life like I have no problem. What people fail to understand is the fact that I do not entertain fear, worry or anxiety. I have learnt to live my worry free life by doing four simple things – PTCD.

Pray: As a believer in Christ and the holy trinity. I take all my worries to God in prayer as my no. 1 port of call. Being a person of faith and having lived my life like this with positive results for over 5 decades has taught me to pray with an expectant heart for a positive result. Part of praying includes being thankful for previous victories with a heart of gratitude and also for eternal access to God himself through Christ Jesus.

Trust: For me to trust means there has been proven track record of success. I believe whatever the outcome of the current situation, even if it is not what I am expecting, it will work to my advantage. So I become open minded towards the result.

Cast: I transfer the problem to God to sort out. No, I do not bury my head in the sand and ignore that I have an issue to deal with. Remember, that I have prayed to someone I trust to sort it out for me. Just like if you have a broken car, you take it to your trusted mechanic; you expect him to call you to let you know the job is complete and if there\’s any part that needs to be added to the car, he will let you know. (I don\’t worry about the process the mechanic takes in getting the car ready. That is his job). That is just how it works when you cast your cares.

Do: Next step is to take action. Once you have done all the above, you have a clearer vision of what your next step of action will be. Whatever step you take will get to the end of the problem, no matter how fast or long it takes. The main thing at that point in time is that you are not stressed or anxious about it. You are taking action.

Takeaway

What you need to know now is that; Worry never added a positive thing to your situation. Worry takes away from you. You can be worry free even if the world around you is collapsing by practicing: Pray- Trust- Cast – Do. Remembering always that #YHTK (You hold the Key)

see www.amazon.co.uk/author/busolashogbamimu for more books by busolashogbamimu

Quarantined moms

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Nothing equates a mother\’s love
Photo by Nicholas Githiri on Pexels.com

It\’s Mother\’s day 2020 and for the first time in many years, most moms are staying at home. No restaurant treat, no church services, schools closed, limited shopping, rationing and no work. A totally unprecedented event in most people\’s life for this generation. The Corona virus pandemic has brought families together more than any other event. Every problem has lots of positive angles, it all depends on where we are looking at it. This year, it\’s all about family and togetherness.

It\’s mother\’s day today and a time to celebrate all women in hibernation. All women under the duvet. All women tending to the welfare of the next generation, All women in hospitals healing and helping the sick. All women at the war front, both civil and domestic. All women kept physically and emotionally.

A woman\’s role is beyond description. Once a baby with no clue of what the world holds, she grows up into a girl with lofty dreams and then a woman of vision. Yet she sets all that aside for a full time job of patiently listening, praying, believing, encouraging, laughing, celebrating, forgiving, understanding, fighting, overlooking and consistently meeting the needs of her family.

Her pride, her goals, her sleep, her dreams, her life and her all are usually always on the back burner. I am a woman. I am proudly a black woman. I celebrate myself together with all my sisters all over the world in every race and ethnicity. Though quarantined globally, we continue to fulfill our roles as destiny shapers to all our children and partners.

You are a Mom as long as you reproduce yourself through mentoring, fostering, adoption, leadership and by giving the best of yourself to the people in your world and leaving a mark for the next generation. Happy Mother\’s day to all women of vision, purpose and dreams. Happy Mother\’s day to all Quarantined moms.

Progress? Halt!

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Mission stoppers

Rarely will you find a right thinking man not seeking progress or success in one venture or the other. We are mostly constantly on a path of making things better or doing things differently towards a better way of life. We set goals, targets and work hard towards them but sometimes it just takes forever to reach these goals.

One of the things that stops us in our track is often times intangible and unreal. Not knowing the problem is more dangerous than knowing the problem. When you know, you begin to look for ways to find solution. When you do not know, you have no idea what to do to solve a stagnating period of life. One major life goal limiting factor is negative thoughts.

Negative thoughts – This is a problem emanating from the mind that once you can tackle, you are on a winning path. Negative thoughts tells you; you cannot do it, you are not equipped, you have none or little knowledge, you will fail, no one survives, you will die etc, BUT once you learn to attack negative thoughts, progress begins for you.

Since negative thought is a problem from the mind, you need to tackle it at source. First, you start by meditating on the positive, then hearing it so often around you by audio listening or conversation. Then you begin to confess it daily and believing your confession until it manifests into reality. Yet, you keep up your confession or affirmation such that it becomes second nature.

Words used to counter negative thoughts include believing on quotes like Napoleon Hills\’ \”What a mind can conceive and believe, it can achieve.\” The operating word there is believing. If you believe the lie, it will manifest itself greatly for you. If you change the game and believe positively for yourself, it will manifest itself greatly for you.

Today is the time for you to start changing the game for your life. You have dreams, goals and desires. Start believing in yourself and your ability to win. If you do not have the skills to carry it out, you will take the necessary action to learn it. Focus on your goal and believe in yourself. You can, you will and you start confessing and acting.

I can. I will. I am able. I know. I am. You are in the driver\’s seat of your life. Something as flimsy as a thought saying it is not possible will not stop you. Understand this too, it is always impossible until it is done. You can and you will. You are more than able. You hold the key #YHTK.

How Much?

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What are you worth in your own eyes?

Think about why people treat you the way you are treated. Confidence in carriage does not arise from copying what you like in other people. Confidence is a product of knowledge. knowledge of who you are.

Too many people suffer from self doubt, insecurity and co dependence on others and lots more emotional problems. Take time to think and understand that not everybody will like you even if you spend all of your lifetime trying to please them. You actually start living the day you stop worrying about other people\’s opinion and start doing what is right for yourself.

How much value do you place on yourself. If you think you are worthless, why do you expect other people to respect you? You are already sending a negative signal, why are you expecting positive? If you plant an apple seed, why are you expecting an harvest of banana? Did you plant banana?

As you see yourself, so will the world see you. Change your belief system today and start seeing only value in yourself because truly you are valuable. Those flaws that you are focusing on to diminish yourself, everyone has them in different degrees. You are no different than any other man, the only difference is they acknowledge their negative parts and have accepted it as part of who they are, yet focused on their positive while self improving generally.

What then are you waiting for? Begin counting the good things going for you and you will begin to see value in yourself. Remember also, #YHTK. Start adding value to yourself if you want others to see value in you and change the negative way you have accepted to be treated.

The 3P\’s of success

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choices on a hamster wheel?

Struggling to decide on the right choice of career to undertake is not a problem for only the young people. Many adults struggle through life, changing career patterns, changing jobs and industries and also changing investment interest to no end. All in the bid of making a choice of the one that is the most lucrative.

Decisions, decisions, decisions! We are confronted with making decisions on a daily basis. What to eat, what to wear, where to go, how to do, when to do etc. No doubt, some people find it easy to make decisions. However, some struggle trying to find the perfect condition, error free option.

Flexibility is important in life and so is structure. Do not be caught at either extreme. What ever you decide to do in life, if you want success along its lines, be sure it is centred around the 3Ps.

People – they are the very reason the world exist. They have needs that need to be satisfied. They are the voices that build and destroy. They are the market place. They require value. They are also and integral part of your success. The formula for people is find out what they need, look for how to provide it, make sure it is adding value to them and watch them go about building you.

Purpose – You were born for a reason. If you don\’t find that reason and fulfill it, you may as well be a hamster on a wheel. You will end up going from pillar to post and running helter skelter in pursuit of nothingness. When you find your purpose and go about fulfilling it, your level of contentment has no bounds. Every human being deserves to find their purpose.

Profit – Whether it be financial, physical or emotional, your time spent in anything you do should be profitable. All the time of our days is spent in activity. For your guaranteed success, cultivate and evaluating attitude of what brings you benefit in all the activities you are engaged in.

When you have all these in the right balance my friend. You no doubt have LIFE – Legacy, Impact, freedom and empowerment. You will live happy and die happy. You will have your footprint in the sand for others to follow.

Remember #YHTK

That One Moment!

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and now you get it!

If you are a parent or a very caring friend, you will fully grasp my message today. When you try so hard to get your children to understand life issues, to safeguard them for the future, or you try and save a mate from a destructive relationship and in their eyes, \”You don\’t get it\”! That is exactly what I am talking about.

I constantly preach a message of savings and investment to my children, because I was one of those in my generation who got formal education instead of financial education. Thankfully, I copped on before it was too late. I want them to be financially independent and retired from the rat race at an early age. Yet, there is that one missing puzzle – the message is never well received when the relationship is too close.

My daughter called me up a couple of months ago, she had been on a night out with her work colleagues and met one of the directors at work, who happened to be a young girl, few years older than my daughter. This young director was chatting about how she scrimps and saves and budgets on everything, watches her spending habits and she finally has her own house, a three bed house in London and she is only 27 years old.

My daughter\’s call was about her eureka moment of seeing the light through another young person\’s vision. She was inspired and started planning on how she was going to change her habits and save more and this and that.

That one moment when the penny drops and the blind receives their sight. That one moment when understanding illuminates your life and you realize that all that you need to be who you need to be is already within you. That one moment when you realize that you are a total package, with nothing missing and nothing lost.

My message to you today is to let you know that you are part of a fully functioning body and no one else will do you like you. You thoughts, your style, your ideas, your skills, your habits, your face and all of you is peculiar to you. You are unique and well endowed to live a happy and successful life. The tools are all within you.

  • Start with self love, appreciation of all of you both hardware and software.
  • Identify your inherent skills
  • Find where your skills can solve a problem for humanity
  • Get your audience
  • Deliver your support
  • Find ways to monetize your delivery
  • Success follows

All in that one moment! #YHTk

Stumbling Blocks

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In the beginning of the year, I decided I was going to expand my sphere of influence by empowering a few good women.  For me, this was part of my purposeful journey for the year.  Part of this mission involved daily messages and sharing of learning resources to propel us all to the next level.  It required commitment and consistency.  The foundational principle of which was gratitude being your daily attitude to delivering your visualized dreams on a regular basis.

On one of the days, I received some shocking news. Easily I could have crumbled but I had to carry on answering messages, delivering speeches, holding myself up and forging on.  My reaction brought back the memory of a young girl who got an ambassadorial role for a renowned charity, as a result of winning a pageant.  A huge responsibility as you would know. 

On one such occasion, she had to deliver a speech to a group of younger girls in a leadership empowerment forum.  She arrived unusually late, almost towards the end of the event.  She delivered an awesome motivating speech to the girls and when leaving called me aside to apologize for her lateness. Her excuse; her family lost their home five days ago and she had been living  between friend’s sofa’s from her suitcase and in different shelters, not knowing where she will be sleeping from night to night, as they struggled to find an alternative place in a city suffering from housing crisis.  She had to go to work and an audition on the same day before eventually showing up at the event.

Her message delivered to the girls took on a new meaning for me as she told them “if you are asked to do something and it resonates with you, just say yes” even if you don’t know how to do it, you will learn later. But saying yes, opens doors for you that you never would have imagined.

What she scaled and I scaled to show up to our audience is called stumbling blocks.  What is standing in your way from achieving your goal today.  Identify your stumbling block and scale it like an accomplished athlete.  Stumbling blocks can be external or internal.  It can show up in the form of family, friend, work, finances, procrastination, rejection or anything meaningful or meaning less.

Whatever it may be, it will not last and it will pass.  Handle it like the professional that you are and move on to your next level. Remember in all of this that you are in the driver’s seat of your life and you firmly hold the key.

Stay off the goals

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Mind over matter. The winner is usually at the end of the race even before the race begins.

It\’s the new year and everyone is up and about setting new year resolutions and goals. Most people are about changing some aspect of life, finances, job, relationship, location and the biggest one is usually weight loss. All these goals, while they are good in themselves, the only bad thing is they are usually a January trend. The slightly better ones hang around till March or April and only the determined ones see the year through.

Before setting goals, how well did you prepare for its actualization. The foundation of any project is the mind. If the mind can conceive it, it will achieve it. Your no.1 task is to embed the end result of the goal into your subconscious mind and live it out each day as you walk through to your desired result.

Good news is you are the one in charge. The sole driver of your destiny. Achieving your desired goals is totally down to your commitment to such. My word for you for today is; Lay a solid foundation by cultivating your mind to living in your desired end result for your goal, then pursue that goal with the belief that it is already in the bag. Simply put, take massive action in living beyond the goal.

Guaranteed three months down the line if you do the above, you will definitely be applauding your progress rather than restarting the game again and again like you did last year and the year before and the year before that.

You were born to win and #YHTK (You hold the key). Happy New Year !

Final words

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2020 excitement

It\’s the last post for this year and I am super excited and sincerely words defy me in explaining my enthusiasm for the new year. In all sincerity, I feel like a five year old kid, awaiting Santa to drop the goodies. All for the transition into 2020.

I am compelled to share some of the operating key words that has opened doors of opportunity and favour for me this year and which I am definitely carrying into the next year.

  • Simplify – Don\’t over complicate any issue. Less is more.
  • Intention – Wake up with intention and carry on through the day in execution of goals with intention. (It is your commitment to yourself).
  • Mindfulness – A skill to be developed in goal achievement.
  • Affirmation/Declaration/ Confession – 3 words one meaning. keep it positive.
  • Manifestation = Faith in action – Propelling reality from the abstract realm.
  • Journal – Write it down and make it plain. (Good for direction and look back memoirs)
  • Reflection – Looking back
  • Balance – A necessary tool to successful living
  • Overwhelm – A mental state of mind you need to check constantly and avoid at all cost.
  • Legacy – Your obligation to humanity.
  • Expectation – An attitude of the mind that delivers your needs.
  • Happy – A constant state of mind reflected by intermittent smiles throughout the day.
  • Freedom – Your right to living free and to be you in every sense.
  • Impact – The number of lives you touch and make a difference in.
  • Empowerment – Every word, thought or deed from you that propels another to becoming a better person in any aspect of life.
  • Purpose – Your personal task on planet earth. Your raison d\’etre.
  • Attitude – Only one word for this GRATITUDE . The key to successful living.
  • Worry – An issue that has nothing to do with you. It resolves itself with minimal action.
  • Time – The equivalent of life. Totally priceless.
  • Identity – Knowing who you are without a shadow of doubt.

These are my definitions for the above words that have blessed me beyond measure and brought great joy to my life. I hope 2019 has been an eventful one for you and pray 2020 brings clarity to your vision.

Let\’s get this party started! Right. Happy New Year in advance and remember always #YHTK

Power House

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What works with what?

As the year steadily draws to a close, a lot of people are preparing for the festive season. Christmas and the New year. Some are planning for the next year because typically the end of the year is a time of reflection and planning for new heights and adventure for the coming year.

Soon it will be January. You will shortly be asked \”What is your New Year Resolution? \” or hear someone ask another the same question. Every right thinking human being wants success on all levels. I recall my sister telling me about a friend of hers whose family Christmas tradition included an accountability session. Every child comes to explain what they have achieved and share their goals for the coming year. I am not at their dinner table or at any of their accountability sessions. I did not know they even did anything of such. What I do know and that is apparent to the whole world is the level of success in this family.

What brought this about is my understanding of how great the mind is. The mind is truly the power house. The creation room, the process and the completion. The board room and factory as well as the marketing place of all that you are. In your mind, what you say to yourself and believe, is what you will execute. What you believe about yourself is what you will introduce yourself as. Someone once said, some people say they are not sales agents and so cannot pitch anyone. But once you introduce yourself to someone with your name and what you do, you have already started the selling process.

The mind as the power house needs to be cultivated with intention. The rave about mindfulness is nothing if you have no intentions. Bring your ideas, your plans and desires to your power house. Become intentional and reflective about every aspect of your life. Do you want to see magic happen? Then follow the steps simple steps below.

  • Wake up with intention to achieve your goals
  • Carry out task with a mindful attitude. (I am doing this task to achieve this goal)
  • Reflect on your success, celebrate your wins and choose improvement areas
  • Go to bed planning for tomorrow with a mindful attitude
  • Keep a journal that documents your path and guides you.

In a short space of time, you will be amazed at what levels of success you can achieve with this simple strategy. The time for clarity is now and you hold the key. Sometimes a little tweaking of other people\’s success levels is what you need to energize you. Be mindful of every action. Be consistent and watch your dreams become a 3D reality for you.

#YHTK

Reflection

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They can see it too!

Not too long ago, I had the opportunity to have one of my life goals accomplished after spending years of looking for the right location, finding the funds to get started and eventually finding a fully kitted restaurant where I took it over as a going concern.

The week before the take over, I had the urge to clean out my space, documents, house and pretty much every area around me needed to have clarity. This was because my subconscious was aware of a new beginning and my mind understood clarity was needed for me to think and take concise actions.

Few years later when I ran into financial difficulties, my state of mind at the time was reflected once again in my environment. All I could see around me was chaos and clutter. Overwhelm became a regular visitor in my head until I took control of my life to find a solution to that situation as well.

The last two days I have spent in a workshop for a self development course, and I marvel once again as I watched the personality of trainers reflecting in all that was done at the weekend. They gave much by way of content, standards, synergy and class. They were super generous and efficient without asking us to break the bank or get in debt to be able to go the next mile.

I don\’t normally do this, but I cannot help but do a shout out to Alison Mackenzie and Darren Jenkins of X10 effect. To the lovely friendly staff and excellent meal service at the Sheraton Skyline hotel Heathrow, You guys rock! To trainers and coaches in transformation industry, keep in mind that just as you are in the industry to transform lives, remember also that your personality and especially your motive reflects in your delivery.

To everyone reading this, remember that self development is the greatest gift you can give yourself and your best investment is You. After all, #YHTK

In the waiting room

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What have you decided?

A good friend of mine is waiting by her brother\’s bed side all day, watching his condition get worse as he is in palliative care. She is anxious and tearful most nights at the thought of losing a loved one to cancer. The outcome expected is no doubt a negative one with nothing to be done but wait and try to make his last days as beautiful as can possibly be. She is in the waiting room.

I am waiting earnestly for a positive response to a request made to someone whose contribution to society inspires me a lot, so that I in turn can continue to add value in my own little way to people in my world. Naturally being a hopeless optimist, I am 100% hopeful of a yes answer. I am in the waiting room.

Someone somewhere under the radar of the sun today is waiting for a partner to put to bed, another waiting for the promotion to be approved, another waiting for the bank to say yes to the credit line request, another waiting for the publisher to say yes, or for the partner to agree to the marriage proposal. Someone waiting for the judge\’s hammer to decide their fate or for the train to come on time.

If you check yourself today, you too are in the waiting room for one thing or the other. I am waiting to retire next year and impact the world more with my extra free time. What are you waiting for?

What happens in the waiting room is more important than being in the waiting room. You can allow your brain to frizzle with fear or rise above to the next level. You can plan on your positive outcome or if negative, plan a positive next step of action. You can be paralysed or become a giant threading on every obstacle.

In the waiting room, victims and victors are born. We were born to rule the planet and the tools for success are all within us. Charge up your thoughts today and rise to the next level. Mandela\’s prison cell was a waiting room for immense victory. Wherever you are today, remain limitless. A free mind can never be caged. Remember always that #YHTK (You Hold The Key). Your life, your terms.

Tell us about your waiting room experience and the outcome, we would love to learn from you.

Transition

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What do you see? What do they see?

A couple of years ago, I was listening to Andrew Wommack\’s message on the way in to work. He was preaching to a congregation of christian believers and he asked the question \”if someone falls down dead right now, would you believe that I can raise him from the dead?\” He went on to explain how most of the people in the audience believed he could but if he called anyone of them out to raise the dead person up alive, most of them do not believe in themselves to perform such a miracle.

Reason being that, Andrew before the congregation is already perceived as \”holy\” and trusted. Andrew went on to explain that each person judged themselves inadequate to perform such a feat because they are conscious of their short comings, doubt and sin. but they do not know if his sins are greater than theirs. Basically trying to make them understand that limiting beliefs is what stops any man from actualizing themselves.

In our every day journey to succeed, we go through different stages. I believe at least 98% of property investors did not start of with a portfolio of properties from the get go, but steadily built one up. Some people did their building process while still working a 40 hour/week job. I discover if you introduce yourself as a property investor, instantly people\’s mind go into how many properties do you have in your portfolio. They fail to see that there are many strategies to property investment, including sending money on errand through crowd funding or development platforms, leveraging, joint ventures or packaging deals.

This is the same in every project we aspire to achieve and not just limited to property investing. In that same success journey, we will encounter different signals. Positivity, optimism, desire, dreams, available usable resources, leverage and many more things create a green light in us to go out there and chance our dream. Your family, friends and work colleague seeing you every day struggling with the same work process you have always done will mostly see red or amber lights as they probably see a dreamer, doubter, same guy with a head in the cloud.

Now, irrespective of what colour light anyone chooses to see including yourself, your journey to success is a transition process only if you believe in yourself to get there and to take take every obstacle in your way as a character forming stepping stone or challenge. The one best thing you can do to your doubters is to show up with your results. Not at their pace, but at your pace.

It\’s another winning Monday and I implore you all to stay on green and remain undefeated. Grab your focus, shine your eyes and go for gold!

After all #YHTK

Becoming debt free

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Pick up the phone and talk to someone

I recall my days as a customer service agent for a utility company. It was in the peak of the recession in Ireland and we were meant to be advising on why the bills are higher, why customers were getting disconnected or going on a different plan. It used to reap my heart out to listen to people crying on the phone and asking me how they were supposed to explain no electricity to their children who is writing the leaving certificate.

Racking up arrears in bills and debts is something that can happen to anyone. If your stream of income is cut off or reduced without backup, or unexpected illness affecting your ability to work with no insurance, or company relocation or business winding up suddenly. My point is nobody opts willingly to be in a negative situation.

But when it happens, it simply has to be dealt with. Burying your head in the sand and wishing it will go away is not a solution. Neither is ignoring the calls of your creditors. I know and can tell from my past experience that this style never works.

If you find yourself in arrears or struggling to keep up with your bills, your best solution is to call the company and explain your situation. Sometimes, they have options in place for cases such as yours. Call up and explain, go into payment arrangement to split the bill into manageable portions. If for some reason, you are not able to catch up still, think of rolling over the outstanding balance with the incoming bill and refresh your payment arrangement. Make sure to be chipping at the arrears, no matter how little.

Note one thing for certain, your creditors need you. They need you to be in good health physically and financially, so that you can pay them what you owe. They need you to be back on your feet so you come back a better customer. They need you as a customer as it saves them the additional cost of replacing you as a customer. You also need them to stay in business so they can continue to deliver the service to you.

Being in debt is not the end of life. It can be a season if you are proactive to snap out of it and keep communicating and continuously reducing it no matter how small. The same way little savings here and there can quickly build a wealthy nest, so does little debts here and there can eventually land you on the street with no shirt on your back.

Be wise! After all #YHTK

My father\’s race

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I remember clearly how daddy wanted me to continue to take science classes even after I failed woefully in my third year exams. Back then in secondary school, your results in third year determines if you are following through to a science, art or commercial class for your leaving certificate exams.

I was clearly an art or commercial student, but my dad wanted me to be a science student by all means. How I got 6% in chemistry exam and 30% overall was beyond me. Summer coaching class and daddy insisted I continue doing sciences. In one of the classes, the teacher, Mr. Mustafa looked at me and said he had never seen me before. I had to remind him I was in the same class with Funsho his daughter. I wasn\’t missing his classes too but was more of a fly on the wall than a student in class.

Thankfully, the school was adamant about it and refused to let me continue in a science class with the appalling grades I had.

Thirty years later, when I first put my experience into writing and gave my dad my first book to read, being the gentleman he was, he was full of apology. But, I thanked him because I understood that he was trying to give me the best opportunity the only way he knew of. I was grateful because I had a first hand experience of a fish trying to climb a tree and I purposed not to make any fish climb a tree.

I was grateful of the opportunity because his persistence forced me to a self discovery journey. I found my identity in a wholesome way. I found purpose along that journey, strengths and weaknesses, likes and dislikes, tolerances and boundaries and above all, transformation.

I encourage you to discover yourself today and live a wholesome life on your own terms. After all #YHTK

Sneak Peak

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Picture from celebritieswhogive.com

A beautiful and true quote I came across while working on my new book says \”Once you believe you can do something, there is not a single person in the universe who can convince you otherwise.\” – Germany Kent.

Now, for those who don\’t know. Germany Kent is an LA-based former award-winning college administrator and corporate executive, author, entrepreneur, turned successful Hollywood commercial actress, and media personality, She has interviewed Oscar, Emmy, Golden Globe, and Grammy-winning performers, this in addition to the other power-players, and news-makers. she has interviewed from across the globe. Germany has been featured in numerous print media. She has had a string of good luck with the Film/TV world, especially noting that she was hand-selected by J.J. Abrams to be featured in a STAR WARS movie. More importantly, she is an award winning global ambassador for hope.

Words like Germany\’s quote above cause deep reflections for me. For someone like Germany Kent to say something like that, you can tell it stems from a place of experience. This is evidenced in the vast diversity of roles, from academics, to media to business and more she had played in her life. For all the achievers you come across in life, it is because they believed in themselves. Some people believe in the universe to converge the forces of nature to make things happen for them and because of their belief, their expectations get fulfilled.

Some call it the law of attraction; others call it faith. Some call it affirmations; others call it confession or declarations. All in all it is working for everyone according to their belief system.

What I find striking with the above quote is the fact that it is amazingly true. It begs on the question of identity. If you know who you are, you will know what you are capable of doing, and as such your belief system automatically convinces you what you can and cannot do. If you have the resources to do it or not, it does not matter. Once you believe you can, no human being born or invented in the universe can convince you otherwise.

What is standing in the way of your belief? What do you think is stopping you from achieving your desired style of living. Please feel free to drop your thoughts in the comment below.

If you believe you can; you are right. If you believe you cannot; you are also right. I know #YHTK. So let\’s hear your thoughts.

The graph and WIP

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The graph and the stage

As an empowerment enthusiast, every opportunity to learn something that will propel me to a new level is always appreciated from my heart. On my most recent training course with Darren Winters, trend lines, rising and falling graphs, was one of the key tools for the training. It just kept showing up as seasons of life in my understanding.

Start up projects are usually hard to pick up and climbing through the obstacles of new business can be quite exhausting. On your map or business plan, you already would have arrived on paper before it becomes visible to the world. You are always steps ahead before it is actually seen. This is the time to be careful who you talk to .

People who are not on your journey and who lack the power of vision can never understand you as Work In Progress. They will prefer to tag you as a dreamer, a joker, a liar or whatever makes them comfortable in their small mind. People are mostly visual and if they can\’t see it, it is not real. But, even when it becomes visible, don\’t expect it to sit well with everyone.

Recently in a business community support forum, someone randomly shared her experience from an abusive relationship where the partner called her very nasty names as well as accused her of fraudulently presenting herself as somebody when she is a nobody. To people who know the steps she has taken so far on her journey, she is well applauded for swiftly moving on and carrying through.

Why I am saying this is to remind and encourage you to understand that there is a stage called start, early, middle, late and finish. We must all pass through these stages in all that we do. While you are work in progress, do not let the thoughts or words of small minded people hold you back, discourage you or doubt yourself. Remember, whatever stage you are in, we all are work in progress until the final whistle.

It is another week full of goals to achieve. Dress up, show up and bring home your goals with a winner\’s attitude. After all, #YHTK.

What is yours?

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Mine was finances and fulfilling purpose

The creatives in the house can attest to the fact that we are unstoppable when it comes to ideas generation. The entrepreneurs will agree that when you think profit and possibility, the music changes to \”let\’s go there\”. Being a creative serial entrepreneur, you find you are constantly on projects without end.

Couple of years ago, I did some soul searching and concluded that I must die empty. Share all my acquired skills and knowledge with as many people as I can, and make sure the grave does not get anything except for my carcass. To this end, I also became a donor carrying card and made sure my family are aware of what to do with my body in the event of my passing.

What brought this about was my finding out the number of unfulfilled talents and gifts that people end up taking to the grave because of fear of venturing out, fear of what people would say, what if it does not work, and many other inconsequential reasons that have no roots or foundation.

I discovered my fear was not being able to fulfill my purpose in life and not having finances to carry out my actions in fulfilling purpose. I did an overall self check and concluded that if others can, so can I. My action plan I will be sharing in detail at some stage. But first, I selected my desired date for an early retirement, embarked on a couple of self development courses, invested myself in multiple streams of income and committed myself to service to help others see the possibility of what is achievable if you believe.

As a serial entrepreneur, I have enjoyed both sides of the fence. When it was very good and when it was very bad. Including having to file for bankruptcy at some stage and coming out of it on the brighter side, starting afresh and stronger. How did I get myself there? How did I get myself out? and How did I start all over to being on the winning side? (Stories for another day).

What do you think is holding you back from becoming your dream self? What do you think is the stop between you and your self in achieving your desired level success? You think you are too old to go after your dreams? Or you think you are too young to start? Age? Finances? You think the resources are not available to get you started? You will be amazed at what you have and can do, when you think deep enough.

Where do you need help getting fulfilled? Is it in finding your purpose or fulfilling it? Or having the support network or family to get you there? There are different reasons for different people. I have shared mine with you. Mine was finances and fulfilling purpose. What is yours? Drop your thoughts on your fears and stumbling blocks in the comment below. A problem shared is a problem half solved.

Above all, remember always that #YHTK

My Narrative

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What do you see?

People close to me know very well that I am a strong advocate of early retirement. Each time I mention early retirement among people my age, the reaction is always the same. It comes in the form of brows going up, a bit of a frown and a singular thought saying \”Really?\”.

We were raised to go to school, study hard and achieve but were not told that the world of work consumes your life till you die, if you don\’t learn to break from it and learn to live. Understanding the very essence of living successfully has propelled me in recent years to make certain choices to change my narrative.

Like you, I grew up with a desire to be successful. Like some others or you, I got an education in a field that was contrary to my passion. Like you or some others, I find myself trying to live my passion and working myself to the bone. But, when I realized that my definition of being successful as a young one was warped and discovered that being successful by me was only defined by MY standards and not society, then my reality began to change.

I embarked on a journey of self discovery. I found success was on a parallel scale of balance in my chosen areas of life. I found purpose and the desire to be the change I wanted to see. I found value in people and not in things. I found the ability to create my chosen path of life lies within me and above all, I discovered the ability to manifest my chosen path. The rest became stories.

My narrative changed from being a grafter to fulfilling purpose. My narrative changed from what people say about me while I am alive but also to what will be said when I am gone. My narrative changed from striving to contentment. I am an advocate of early retirement and ways to work towards its achievement because of my journey this far, and because of the vast majority of people still chasing bubbles on the high way on a daily basis, wondering \”How do I get out of this?\”

There are loads of narratives out there in the world today such as:

  • A grafter – A grafter is a hard worker. Works 2 or more jobs, Does nothing but graft no social life. (Ref: Urban dictionary)
  • A die hard – Someone who is willing to do anything for a cause or a goal. (Ref: Urban dictionary)
  • Basic – Calling someone Basic is essentially calling them predictable or unoriginal. You\’re saying they blindly follow trends and have no individuality or style of their own. (Ref: Dictionary.com)
  • Extra – You know what it means when you call someone too much right? You mean to say they’re “excessively good or bad,” or that they’re prodigious or overwhelming. Well, there’s too much, and then there’s extra. (Ref: Dictionary.com)

While there are many more descriptive words that tells what we spend our lives doing, it is up to us to make our days count and our lives meaningful. I have shared my narrative with you. What is your current narrative and what do you hope to change yours to? Drop your thoughts in the comment below. Let\’s get the dreams moving together. After all #YHTK and it\’s never too late or too soon to start!

Expectations & Roles

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Could this be you or another AI style?

It is 100% crazy how society places demands on us based on gender, culture, background, appearances and whatever it wakes up to and we like puppets conform to those roles and struggle to live up to those expectations, sometimes without questioning the basis of such demands because it has been accepted as norm.

What is normality at the end of the day?

Years not too long ago, men were supposed to be the bread winner while the woman is the home maker and then comes demand on the boy child to be a \”MAN\” and the girl child to be submissive and answerable to the \”MAN\” who is the breadwinner. The poor boy then begins the race of chasing money making ventures that will pay the bills, put food on the table, clothe the family and God help his blessed life if the wife is a demanding one that checks out the life with the \”Joneses\”

The girl on the other hand must make sure food is available for the man when he comes home from hard work, his clothes clean and ironed, the house clean and spotless and the kids fed and decent.

What happened to individuality?

Because of the expectation from society, we become like robots conformed to roles that were shaped for us and some forget what it was like to have a dream, to run with your dream. Some never experience the joy of seeing visions become reality. Some gaze into the night sky daily watching their dreams die a daily death, some stopped dreaming while others daily chant \”if only\”.

Know this for a fact, you can never be completely happy if you continue to live according to other people\’s expectations of you. Sometimes what is expected of you is what you want and the role you are playing is what has been designed for you. Other times, you are just fulfilling obligations like a pre-programmed robot with no thought for itself but what was punched or drummed in.

Start checking yourself against your current role and expectation. Don\’t end up as another asset in the grave yard. Live your life fulfilled and impact others with the good in you. Make a difference and be the difference you want to make. Life is too short to live AI style when you are a total package and breathing human blessing.

After all #YHTK

It\’s not December

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What value do you place on it?

No, it\’s not December but it is time to take stock and determine what needs keeping and what goes in the bin. Not all relationships are beneficial and not all relationships are toxic. There are some people in your life who are taking up space when they should not be in your life in the first place. There are places in other people\’s life where you are taking up space and you really should be at the door marked EXIT.

What value do you bring to the table in your relationships? I remember a very dear friend of my sister who added the term \”Salt\” to her name. She made a point of being a seasoning spot to people that cross her path. She is a blessing and encouraging others to be a blessing even through a single meeting or message.

In the same manner, I worked with a girl who willfully makes up defamable stories behind people\’s back about everyone to cover her own inadequacies while claiming love and sisterhood to the outside world. A pure judas style relationship. Clearly relationships mean nothing but word of mouth to such a person and the value of her relationship with her work colleague is determined by her choice of knife when she stabs them in the back to save her face.

It\’s not December I repeat, relationship stock take should be done periodically and not only at the end of the year. How are you adding value to the people in your own life? Where are you being taken for granted? Where have you left your dignity on the floor to be trampled on? Who have you constituted yourself as a nuisance in their lives? Do you need to exit, review or amend?

The essence of stock taking is to ascertain worth. What value do you place on yourself and the relationships you have. Time to think and evaluate. After all, #YHTK.

Beyond your nose

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It\’s within your reach if you look well enough.

I had a conversation with my son recently about his plans for the future and clearly his answer as a young adult is exactly what I hear a lot of people say about starting out. Planning for success is simply daunting. The conversation for me as a parent trying to encourage my \”baby\” to move beyond fear, was more enlightening than I imagined.

Often times when we look at starting a project, business, relationship etc, the resources we need are foremost the imaginary stumbling blocks. This is more so especially when it is a capital intensive project and credit rating is not in your favour. The big needs often stand in front of our dreams blocking out the resources we currently hold that can work out the big needs.

Some of the resources we ignore and can leverage are human capital, contact list, support network, skills leverage – getting someone to do what you need in exchange of services they need and you are capable of doing for them or even linking them with someone you know who can.

What is most important in executing our long term plan is what we know already but need to be reminded of every time. Start from the exact spot you are. Start from your comfort zone and let your dreams carry you, manifesting into a workable business plan. Leverage your people, your network, your skills and all resources at your disposal. Make sure you do something daily and mindfully towards your success.

It\’s not always about money. Look beyond your nose. Think outside the box and go achieve your dreams. For foodies like me, I say turn that loaf of bread into a sliced pan and work at having a toast a day. After all, #YHTK

Closer Look

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It starts with you

Take a close look at your life today. Despite all the challenges, difficulties and so-called failures, you are still here. You are still forging ahead, still trudging along. It is sometimes difficult to see the bright side of life when all that surrounds you is distraction, struggles, complications and tight schedules.

Have you taken a closer look at your achievements recently and see all the trophies you left on the side walk. Have you seen the victories you won at work that was not recognized? The excellent contribution to the family that everyone took for granted as your job or the keeping it all together for the friends in confidence, advise and guidance that was taken for granted.

Stop for 5 mins today to take a good look at you and appreciate the lines on your face, the hardness of your hands, the sweat on your brow, the heaviness of your sighs and for goodness sake show yourself some love that you truly deserve. You are doing a great job and it will come together in time. Love yourself as you go and let yourself tell yourself that \”YOU, are doing a good job!\”

After all, #YHTK and you have a lot more to be thankful for.

Become a life designer

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Be the architect of your own destiny. If others can, so can you!

I used to think it was a bit exaggerated to live life just the way you want it, that you can really have all that you want. But, recently I have moved away from cynicism to become a believer and also concluded that understanding your role in life is vital to becoming your best version of yourself.

Think about it, if you don\’t know your current location or have the address of where you are going, of what use is google maps to you? You need to know yourself – Identity. Know who you are, likes, dislikes, passions, gifts, capacity. That is your current location.

You also need to know what you want from life, who you want to be, what you need to discard, what you need to adopt, how you want to be known or seen, what you want to deliver as a sign of being on this planet, who you want to identify with etc. That is your destination address.

The designing tool – Your personal life google map is found within yourself. You were created to be a creator in the image of who created you. All that you need to be you in within you. However, you need to learn to harness it and bring it forth. Some people call it the power of faith and others call it the law of attraction.

As far as I am concerned, you can give it whatever name that will help you be the best version of you. I am sharing Helene Hadsell\’s video of her SPEC method of getting what you want from life with the hope of you joining the group of very few people who have hacked the secret of faith.

Panic Paralysis

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  • Articulate hesitation is better than inarticulate certainty.

Like you and many others, I am on a race against time. I have set deadlines to achieve certain goals in my life and I know I will achieve them. However, because there is so much calling my attention, I am sometimes caught up in distractions here and there. What I have learnt though is that the distractions stop me in my tracks, I back track a bit and then I start to think of time lost.

Then I sometimes panic. (Not good at all). I don\’t know about you but once I panic, I become confused, disoriented and paralysed with inactivity. I once shared one of such experiences with my sister and she likened my brain to the computer, with many windows opened. After a while if it is still working, the processes slows down and if unable to slow down, sometimes freezes, then ultimately crashes!

Our human body is the same, just like the computer and the brain, everything needs a break. If we keep working on high speed roll without sensible break, the body will shut down in phases. So, sleep is essential, balance is important, break is inevitable.

It\’s a new week, fresh targets and goals to be accomplished by Friday and some by the end of each day. Don\’t panic, if you want the goals achieved. Learn to stay calm, step back and restrategize your action plans in a more focused manner. You get more done with a clear head than in a panic form where nothing is moving.

Worry and stress has not achieved much for me so far in life and I am sure same goes for you. I implore you to join me this week as we work through a calm, refreshing focus on our live goals, while stopping to smell the roses, watch a movie, treat yourself, pat yourself on the back with the small wins, catch up with friends and family. Life is to be enjoyed daily and not endured.

Real success comes with mindfulness of your actions and articulated rest is indispensable to the human body.

From my heart I wish you a brilliant new week in every form, after all #YHTK.

Random Reflection on Time Accounting

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    Tempus fugit: Time flies

I read a beautiful write up about time sometime during the week. It was a post shared on my old girls association platform. The reason why it resonated with me so much is because I have been reflecting on time in recent days, so coming across that post, simply opened my eyes to my other perspective of time.

The writer began with \”It is a mistake to think time is going. Time is not going. Time is here until the world ends. It is you that is going. You don\’t waste time. You waste yourself. You are finite. It is you that grows old and die. Time doesn\’t. So make better use of it…….\”

Harsh as it may sound. it is absolute sense. Which brings me back to my reflection on time accounting. There are 24 hours in a day. What do you spend yours doing? Who pays for the time you spend at work, play, family time and unaccountable time (wasted time).

When you show up at work, you have exchanged a part of your life for a fixed amount of income, that you agreed with your employer. The passage of time is the passage of life. Whatever you spend your time doing must add value to your life. it is not always monetary value because time spent with loved ones is priceless and should be memorable.

As we go into a fresh Monday week, the onus lies on you to make your life count. Think time. Think value. Think life and make sure it is worth your while.

One thing you can do this week is to evaluate the cost of your time. write out every hour of your day in one column, match each hour with an activity that you performed in that hour. In a different column write out how much you receive as income for each activity per hour. Value for each activity will vary from person to person and some activities will be priceless.

You will easily identify where you waste time, and how you can start saving on time and making good use of your life, because time is life. You will also be able to identify where you add value to other people\’s life, where you let other people steal into your life and where you steal from other people\’s life.

This time evaluation activity is a mindful exercise that you will be glad you did. Take 20 minutes at the end of every day to review your time evaluation sheet and I guarantee you, if mindfully performed, you will be a transformed human being by the end of one week.

Above all, dont mix business with pleasure unless business is pleasure. After all #YHTK.

euuhh! That is disgusting!

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Euhh! Yuck!

I am probably ranting as opposed to writing with this post today! It is so annoying the way people show case their ignorance and lack of basic manners in expressing their dislike for anything that is foreign to their everyday experience.

Show someone a cultural experience or ask them to taste a spicy dish that is uncommon to their everyday experience, and they come up with \”that is horrible\” or \”that is disgusting\”.

When will people learn to understand that the horrible or disgusting experience is personal to them alone. If one person out of every hundred in the world can enjoy a thing, then there is nothing wrong with the activity or product or thing.

There is absolutely nothing wrong in saying “I don’t like it “. or “I find it not to my taste”. That is still a true expression of your feeling.

Learning to express your experience as personal to you is basic manners rather than showing absolute lack of grace. Simple ways of expressing your experience can be:

  • Sorry, It is not my thing. (Your facial expression will automatically tell the story)
  • I don\’t like it or that is different (For more cultured people who are conscious about other people\’s awareness).
  • I find it disgusting or I find it horrible (For people that really want to express the extent of their intolerance. Your personification of your FIND experience shows your feelings).

Some people think it is posh to knock other cultural experiences by saying \”it is disgusting or it is horrible\”, without realizing they are the one\’s being pitied by their sheer display of lack of grace.

It is also a reflection of people who blame others for their own short comings and who fail to take responsibility for their actions.

If you belong to that category, check yourself. Respect and tolerance should be evident in all that we say and do.

All in all, the onus lies on us as change agents to raise our children with good manners, as a reflection of positive upbringing and understanding of equality and diversity in the society.

Also to comport ourselves in like manner. After all, children do what they see and not what they are told.

Rant concluded!

Remember! #YHTK. Only you, hold the key!

Who is Deji Adenuga?

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Deji Adenuga, celebrating the historic moment when HIS wife became the first black woman to be elected into a county council in Ireland.

On the 27th of May 2019, the Republic of Ireland held both local and European elections. History was made in Ireland as a black woman was elected for the very first time to a county council in the name of Yemi Adenuga. Navan was once again made a historic point for Ireland.

The news went all over media and celebration was huge among the African and faith communities in Ireland. This is so because if you have met Yemi Adenuga and held conversation with her, you know without a shadow of doubt that she is a woman of faith and integrity. I recall a conversation where she stated clearly that her name is her integrity and she goes all out to protect it.

In the age where women are subtly emerging to be able to stand on equal platforms and deliver along side a man, it is without any shadow of doubt that Yemi has been nurtured and shielded with love by a man who definitely understands how to treat a woman.

Deji Adenuga, a well known Nigerian actor plays no game and is neither entertaining when it comes to showcasing real men. His support for the numerous causes and projects that his wife dabbles into is publicly unflinching. He does not see her as a threat, but rather as a star shining on the top of his crown. She bears HIS name and showcases his home. In his own words \”I am the husband of a strong woman\”. That, is a fact.

The first time I heard Deji Adenuga say that, I knew without any shadow of doubt, that this is a man who has no doubt about his identity. He knows the capabilities of his wife to be limitless and understands his role as her husband, was to help her burn her unlimited energy in motion in the most positive way, by impacting lives together for a fulfilled destiny globally.

As history was made in Ireland on the 27th of May 2019, I proudly stand in the light of well defined feminism to celebrate a STAND OUT man – Deji Adenuga, for knowing his identity as the head that propels the neck to lead the body into fullness of purpose. Lack of identity and understanding has been a key force in destroying many relationships, particularly within the African culture.

Deji Adenuga, you are today celebrated among men and women and this historic victory is clearly yours. On behalf of women struggling through different conditions for fulfillment in relationship, purpose, freedom and empowerment, and on behalf of men taking your victory as a learning curve for their own self improvement, I say \”Thank you\”.

One month only

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Stop and imagine just for one moment.  You have worked hard this last month, you woke up early to do the morning commute for one or two hours in to work.  You have dealt with the insatiable demands of your manager and the incessant questions from subordinates, or the queries arising from curious and unappreciative customers.  

It\’s lunch time and you take a quick peek at your email and it is that time of the month – bills coming in.  Not bad, tomorrow is payday! But, the wages fail to hit YOUR bank.  Some problem with payroll and they don\’t see a solution in sight but they have assured to give you an IOU for some amount of money that does not meet your need.  When the problem is resolved, the balance due will be paid with next  month\’s wages.

Just one month wages messed up through no fault of yours and your total financial system is ruined temporarily.  We have been conditioned to live from one pay check to the other with slim chances of breaking free, one month\’s paycheck can be the beginning of a poverty cycle.

Imagine!

It is not the payroll next time, it is ill health. You or any member of the family can fall ill anytime without notice, requiring your attention and time away from work.  Unplanned time. One month or one week.  

How many weeks can you afford without pay with no effect on your lifestyle or set you back into a poverty trap?  Do the math.  After all, #YHTK.

Save!      Invest!      Plan!     Multiple streams of income!     Network! Build!    Trade!   Sell!    Leverage!    Skills!    Character!    Attitude!

Think and Fast!

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Have you ever been in a situation where you ask yourself, \”How did you get into this kind of exclusive mess?\” Or be in the company of someone who just landed themselves in a peculiar mess. It is particularly difficult if you are one of those people that take extra precaution before execution, or a good thinker – you think things through to the last detail and put every safeguard in place. The first thing that usually comes up is HOW?

How? Could be solution or review. At the point of problem, what is needed is solution. Well, It is time to train your brain for quick fix thinking. For you to become a fast problem solver, your How, What and Who will need to be working at the fore front of your thinking panel. Not only will you be capable of thinking fast, you will be able to increase brain memory capacity, You will do more for yourself and others through multitasking both simple and complex situations.

So, get your thinking cap now and your imagination for solution solving practice and be your household hero. After all, you hold the key! #YHTK

Questions and Answ……..

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Think and live fulfilled

A lot of people still wander through life, searching for meaning, purpose and self in a daily robotic lifestyle and confused state of mind. Articulate hesitation is said to be better than inarticulate certainty. When you learn to do a bit of self search, deep thinking self search, not surface check, then you will find answers to you as a being, why you are here and how to be happy.

I am posting a few self help questions today in the hope that at least One person will have a transformative life changing experience if they are able to follow through with these questions. My one request is that if you find value in this, please don\’t keep it to yourself. Share with someone else to help them have a better quality of life too.

Now, question time:

  • What do I want?
  • What do I need it for?
  • Why do I want it?
  • What can happen if I don\’t get it?
  • What can happen if I do get it?
  • Where do I get it?
  • When can I get it?
  • Who has it?
  • Who can help me get it?
  • What do I need to get it?
  • What will it cost me to get it?
  • What will I give for it?
  • How soon can I have it?

Go get it! After all #YHTK!

Whose race are you running?

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Few years ago a friend referred an insurance agent to me to carry out a life insurance policy. As I welcomed her to my home, she asked a question totally out of context, but it indicated what was uppermost on her mind. She said \”What do you think of people emigrating?\” We live in Ireland, there was a time of mass entry into the country and at the time she was asking, people were indeed emigrating en masse.

I answered her that, if people were thrown into a field with different job specifications, one was to clear the ground, another to sow the seeds, another to water and another to harvest. And the person sent to harvest sees the one that cleared the ground and the other that sowed the seeds going home, will he then pack up and say it is time for him as well? She pondered for a while and said it is true.

So, even though you are on the same street and doing the same job, your visions and missions are not the same. Stop comparing. Live your life on  your own terms, according to your own vision. Be focused on your own goals and leave others to walk their journey.  Stay in your lane. #YHTK

The small things – Getting ahead

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The year is just in and days will roll over each other, then it\’s December again. Don\’t forget to celebrate your small wins as you daily go about achieving your dreams and visions. The small wins leads to the big victory.

No matter how small they are, they all add up. Setting deadlines, meeting goals, saving costs, saving time, innovative ideas, creative suggestions,taking notes, marking off checklist and so on. Trust me, they all add up.

Be proud to share your small wins at the end of the page and encourage someone else to be like you. Together for your success.

Power of Yes!

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Say Yes and open that door.

Some people are experts at saying NO and do so at their own peril, while some say yes even to their own detriment. When and how then can we strike the balance. I remember writing the story of a dedicated young lady, who was invited to speak at a leadership conference and turned up very late. The program was juggled around to the point of almost eliminating her role and then she came. She apologised profusely and was given the chance to do her talk as soon as the opportunity came.

She went on to tell the younger girls in attendance about saying yes to the call of duty. She gave a speech that shared her life story of saying Yes to a beauty pageant and she won. This in turn opened the door to be an ambassador to a charity, that led her to charitable work abroad where she had the opportunity to meet film stars from the country. This led to her being asked to feature in a film. All because she said Yes!

She said Yes to my charity when she was invited to speak. I found out at the end of the day that she came late because she was in the middle of a housing crisis, while juggling full time work and sleeping on a sofa without assurance of where the next night will find her. Yet, she came. Will I ever forget her? Absolutely not!

I am reminded of her story today as I think of my week ahead and the years gone by. I said yes to attend a conference that opened my eyes to personal development and then – the industry got me. I became a growth junkie and I love it. This has opened doors for me to meet the most amazing network of sound people. Unstoppable in the good they are putting out in the world. I said yes, to an invitation to support a friend over 11 years ago and it opened the doors of leadership and growth for me.

As I shared my story with one of my new family members (JMT DNA), I have been asked to attend a recorded session to recount my journey. I sure am looking forward to it. I know it will encourage one or two people sitting on the fence about taking decisions in life. Life is for living and live purposefully. The world is waiting for you to deliver your share of your goodness. Don\’t let fear hold you back. You hold the key!

Peace maker or Pace maker

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In a world where arguments, broken homes and relationships is the order of the day, there is a greater need and urgency for solution providers before things escalate. What difference would it be to have water poured over the fire spark before it becomes a full blown blaze.

For as long as we are not a clone of ourselves, we are bound to have differing opinion on anything and everything. To see things from the same point of view is a blessing that should not be taken for granted. Why then should we allow resentments, anger, discord, and other negative emotions to build up to destroy us, when we can intentionally try and find a common ground.

Purposing to be the peace maker in a relationship does not mean you are laying yourself as a door mat. It means you are willing to listen, try and understand the other person\’s perspectives without bias to your own thoughts and emotions. Also trying to see the underlying and unspoken reason that could make them hold such a stance. Then trying to reach a common ground.

Watch the video below and think of how damaging small unresolved issues can lead to full blown destruction of human lives.

When peace is truly out the window, healing of the heart is often required. Whether it is in form of the physical pacemaker being attached to the human body, or human equivalent by way of; family, friends, society etc. Let\’s all work on being the peacemaker and the peace keeper, instead of the pacemaker. #YHTK

Ready, Fire, AIM!

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The first time I heard the expression, I thought to myself; that cannot be right. How can you prepare for a thing, execute it and then position yourself? Should you not get ready first, aim and then fire? We are used to being told to get ready when opportunity comes knocking. We are familiar with opportunity meeting preparedness to create success.

\”Opportunity and preparedness is the love relationship for success\”

In recent times, I have come to appreciate the concept of ready, fire and aim. We can never be fully ready for anything because nothing is perfect. There will always be an opportunity to fine tune it and ease the creases around the corners. The color is always going to need tweaking and the angle rotated left and right. There is always a thing to add on to make that project better than its current state.

What about failing forward?

Think of the fact that the so called professionals are still failing at every step of improvement. The only difference is they took the very first step, knowing that it was not perfect. What then are you waiting for? Do what you have to do by failing in the positive direction. Be prepared by planning and then just do it. Get yourself up from the result and dust up to position yourself again in the right direction.

I am hoping the message is getting clearer with every word. Get ready, fire! then aim. You hold the key #YHTK

From Whispers To Statutes

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Women gossip; Gossip for change Photo by August de Richelieu on Pexels.com

Look around you and they are everywhere. Some prominent and others are seen as insignificant. Our personalities are different, yet we all carry the same power. Some louder than others to no effect, while others are soft and gentle like the rudder of a ship, yet they steer the massive vessel to its destination.

It breaks my heart when I read of women short changing themselves in any relationship. Be it spousal, friendship, work or any relationship. I believe strongly in the power of a woman to change the world. I believe strongly in our power to change destinies. Created to be carriers and incubators, whether we have biological children or not, we are carriers and shapers of destinies.

Right from conception, words spoken to the unborn baby is already preparing the destiny of that child. Words used daily in whispers is creating the nurturing environment for a healthy, emotionally balanced individual. Words used in correcting the toddler will either shape him or break him. The power to build destinies lies in the woman\’s hands.

A well raised son understands it is important to treat women well and will never raise his hands to a woman. He stands up to defend the causes of the weak in society. He ensures resources are distributed fairly and will not be just all about himself.

A well raised daughter also understands the importance of self respect, dignity and fairness for her husband and her household. She carries herself with humility and respect. Her head is held high and her ears open to listen, while her hands and legs are ready to run the race to help others.

The innate power of every woman to design and change the story of humanity begins from baby whispers, classroom whispers, table whispers, bedroom whispers and every opportunity to whisper. It also ends in statutes.

Women gossip and men discuss they say. Women gossiping changed the case of child marriage into an abolished practice in a particular country. I challenge you as a woman today to make your gossip session one that promotes positive change in society. Give the men something to discuss to build a better tomorrow for the next generation.

After all #YHTK. Be a game changer for your generation today with a globally resounding whisper.

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